It says simply “Thunderbolt — Party Naked” next to a phone number.

I’m not going to lie, this profile of “Thunderbolt, Detroit’s smallest strip club, is officially the most interesting thing I’ve read in ages.  It might be easy to get sucked in by photos like this (try and focus on his face if you can):

But, honestly, it’s paragraphs like this that suck you in:

Thunderbolt, who stopped using his real name years ago, is a striking sight. He’s 6 foot 5, has longish hair combed back, and he wears a black suit with a bulletproof vest underneath and a gun on his waist. His face droops on one side, the after-effects of getting shot in the head, in a Detroit alley, when he was 11 years old.

And also:

Thunderbolt just might be indestructible. As a kid he got 10 operations during a 10-month hospital stay after getting shot by a stranger as he headed home one night. He spent most of his career as a bodyguard; once for a dirty cop, another time for the owner of a porno theater. In his time he’s been stabbed with a crochet needle in the thigh. Shot in the shoulder. Stabbed in the back. Blasted by buckshot. Wounded by a bullet in his calf. He figured that, if anything, strip club work would be less dangerous. So far so good, except for a burglary last year. The club’s front door is half plywood right now because Thunderbolt nailed it there to cover the jagged hole left by the shotgun blast he aimed at the fleeing robbers.

Seriously, read the whole thing.

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